Author: A cBell Central Original
Date Published: 05.01.2001
Description: This is another original from those lovely rides to the ski slopes. It’s a parody of a caller calling into the Delilah show. It could probably be funnier, but oh well, you know. It’s possible that there will be more of these Delilah parodies in the future, we will just have to see 🙂
Delilah: Hello there, I’m Delilah, and you’re listening to Delilah after dark. I’m here to take your calls and help you through those tough times that may be plaguing you. Did I mention that I’m Delilah, well if it slipped my mind, I am Delilah and you’re listening to Delilah after dark. Are you having trouble after a hard breakup, have someone in the hospital who isn’t doing too well, well I can help. Just call in and tell me your problems and I will pick out an appropriate song to make your troubles disappear, and create a more care free life for you and your loved ones. Shortly we’ll take our first call, but first let’s here from one of our sponsors. Kit Kat Bar – Give ME a break!
Commercial: (singing) Give me a break, give me a break, break me off a piece of that Kit Kat Bar….. yeaaaaaaaaaaaaa (end singing). Now back to Delilah
Delilah: Hello again, you’ve got Delilah back with you ready to take your calls. Oh I see we have a first call. Please give us your name caller.
Caller #1: Yeah, hi Delilah, this is Greg S. from Atlanta, GA.
Delilah: Well hello Greg, and how are you on this wonderful, glorious, evening?
Greg: Well Delilah, I’m kinda feeling a little sad tonight. You see Delilah, I wasn’t five years ago today when I fell in love with my high school sweetheart all over again.
Delilah: That’s sweet (turns on NBC so she can watch FRIENDS) Greg, go on.
Greg: Yeah, well we were in high school and I was just sitting there in class and…
Delilah: Greg, this isn’t a twenty-four hour show, please get to your problem.
Greg: Gee golly gosh darn whiz, Delilah, I sure am sorry. Anyhow, My high school love was a black lab that I named Oreo. Oreo and I were married on a crisp autumn’s evening and we were inseparable. We would frolic in pastures, chase geese, and sniff other peoples rear ends together. Can I say rear ends on radio Delilah?
Delilah: Yes, Greg, you can, go on.
Greg: Well, Delilah, she left me today. We had a small fight last night over some left over bones, and this morning she just up and left with a poodle from down the street. Delilah, I just don’t know what to do (sobbing), she was my love, my life, my, my, my best friend!
Delilah: (To herself) Wow what a looser! (To Greg) I feel your pain Greg. What can I do to help.
Greg: Well Delilah, I really think a song would make everything all better. I think I could move on with my life if only I were to hear a song. Delilah: Well Greg, you are in luck, I can do that for you! As a matter of fact I think I have something that will fit your situation perfectly. Greg, here is your song, and Greg, please love someone tonight! (Delilah singing) WHO LET THE DOGS OUT, WHO, WHO, WHO! (Delilah shuts up, the song continues, and fades out at the end to a commercial for some type of foot fungus remover!)